C. J. Maurer's Disassociation Letter
July 16, 2001
Dear
Brothers,
Thirty-one years ago on March 14, 1970, I was baptized
as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. Along with 55 others at a circuit assembly in
Lafayette, Indiana, I answered yes to the following questions:
Have you recognized yourself before Jehovah God as a
sinner who needs salvation, and have you acknowledged to him that this
salvation proceeds from him, the Father, through his Son Jesus Christ?
On the basis of this faith in God and in his provision
for salvation, have you dedicated yourself unreservedly to God to do his will
henceforth as he reveals it to you through Jesus Christ and through the Bible
under the enlightening power of the holy spirit?
I ceased from serving men or any manmade organization.
It was a happy time in my life. I was baptized in the name of the Father, the
Son, and the Holy Spirit, a scriptural course. I had separated myself from the
blood-guilty churches of Christendom. Or so I thought.
What follows is a self- examination on whether
aspects of my life course over the past 30 years have been in harmony with my
vows. Can I say “I am clean from the blood of all men”?
Shortly after I was baptized, the brothers in Malawi
started having trouble because they would not purchase a political party card. The
Watchtower Bible & Tract Society had admonished them not to as it would
break their Christian neutrality. The results were horrific; thousands died
at the hands of maniacs, sisters were raped, young and old, and others were
severely beaten. Almost all of our brothers lost their property and jobs.
I admired their Christian stand and was honored when
the brothers asked me, a young pioneer, to help in contacting local officials
to request that they write to the Malawian government to put an end to the
persecution of my dear brothers. I carried out that assignment at the side of
the pioneer sister who had studied the Bible with me.
I specifically bring up the matter of the brothers in
Malawi because of the vacillating view of the WTB&TS regarding neutrality,
the superior authorities, and civil service. Sufficient to say is that at the
time our brothers were dying in Malawi, Mexican brothers were bribing
officials at the sanction of the WTB&TS to obtain an ‘Identity Cartilla for
Military Service’. This put them in the first reserves of the Mexican army.
Four years after I was baptized, I met a brother and
married. Although he did not share my “zeal” for the ministry, he was a good,
kind person. Five years after we were married, we moved to the Bloomington,
Indiana congregation. Jim knew the brothers there, having lived there for many
years, and it was my hope that they would encourage him spiritually.
Although elders were counseled to make regular visits
on the sheep, we lived in Bloomington for three years before such a visit took
place. Two elders made arrangements to call, but they only wanted to talk to
Jim. I took this as a good thing; they were going to help him as an individual.
When they left, he seemed rather upset. It seems that
someone had seen him smoking and reported it to the elders. I was shocked that
he would do such a thing, but he assured me he would try to quit. Two weeks
later, he was disfellowshipped. I can’t remember if I was pregnant at the time,
or had just given birth, but needless to say, it was a hard time for our
family.
My view at the time was fashioned after comments from
the WTB&TS such as the one that follows from the April 15, 1988 Watchtower:
“Cutting off from the Christian congregation does not involve immediate death.
Thus, a man who is disfellowshipped or who disassociates himself may still
live at home with his Christian wife and faithful children. Respect for God’s
judgments and the congregation’s action will move the wife and children to
recognize that by his course, he altered the spiritual bond that existed
between them.” (Bolding mine). Such comments would gradually destroy our family
life.
Taking the WTB&TS view on disfellowshipping quite
seriously, I took a hard line against my husband, as did others in the
congregation. Our marriage over the next five years deteriorated. I was angry
at him for his weakness. We separated and divorced after another year and a
half. By then, I had “scriptural” evidence of unfaithfulness. Approximately two
years later, Jim committed suicide. The despair wrought by not being able to
overcome his addictions, and the lack of compassion exhibited by those who
would no longer speak to him, persons who had known him for years, took their
toll. I’m examining myself in this matter, remember, and I am one of those who
lacked compassion. Jim is dead. His two children miss him. His family and
friends miss him. I miss him. It feels good to admit that I miss him. But it’s
too late…
Regarding the so-called blood issue: I have a terminal
cancer. My illness (ovarian cancer) was diagnosed approximately the same time
last year as the information the WTB&TS published on accepting a variety of
blood fractions. I did not examine the article at the time due to my being ill
and refused a blood transfusion for my hysterectomy. My surgery was cut short
because of my low blood count; a complete “debulking” could not be done in
which more small cancer clusters are removed from tissue surrounding larger
more obvious cancer masses, thus affecting my prognosis (I am a single parent
with two young children). At the time, I was glad to take a “stand on the blood
issue”. Now I have concluded that there is no such Biblical issue. Blood parts are
blood. The command not to eat blood is just that, not an injunction against
blood transfusions.
How many of our dear brothers and sisters (including
children) have died because of a policy concerning blood transfusions which
apparently is going the way of the dinosaur? Does this make the WTB&TS
blood-guilty? What about those, such as myself, who sincerely taught that
transfusions were against the law of God? Blood-guilty?
I remember the 1975 debacle. Yet references are few in
the WTB&TS’s new indexes to articles that were preparing Jehovah’s
Witnesses to view the end as coming in 1975. Why is that brothers? Could it be
because Acts 1:7 plainly states that it “doesn’t belong to you to know the
times and the seasons that the Father has placed in his own jurisdiction.”?
How are we to view predictions of such a nature? Deuteronomy 18: 20-22 states,” ‘However, the
prophet who presumes to speak in my name a word that I have not
commanded him to speak or who speaks in the name of other gods, that
prophet must die. And in case you should say in your heart: “How shall we
know the word that Jehovah has not spoken?” when the prophet speaks in the
name of Jehovah and the word does not occur or come true, that is the word that
Jehovah did not speak. With presumptuousness the prophet spoke it. You
must not get frightened at him.’
I am no longer frightened.
I have asked my Heavenly Father to forgive me on many
counts including: (1) My part in contributing to the despair that led to the
death of my first husband. We would have been married 28 years as of July 14 ;
(2) I am the one who introduced my sister to the teachings of the WTB&TS.
When she decided to leave because of false accusations from a sister, she
experienced great fear and anxiety because she thought she had damned her four
children to eternal destruction. I am sorry for this. (Incidentally, I no
longer believe that our Creator is going to slaughter billions of human beings.
The horror this scenario presents, which I have suppressed for three decades
now, transcends the tortures of hell-fire that some churches present. I will
love my neighbor as myself, not picture him or her as the victim of such
cruelty); (3) My part in teaching now changed views of the WTB&TS regarding
blood and neutrality that resulted in decisions that caused mental and
emotional anxiety to those who believed me. Am I blood-guilty? If so, may the
ransom of Jesus cover my sins.
I am thankful for having known the few associated with
the WTB&TS who have developed true Christian qualities and continue to
manifest the fruit of God’s spirit, especially kindness. I have a special place
in my heart for many of Jehovah’s Witnesses and always will. I think that they
know who they are.
I have not forsaken the vow I made on March 14, 1970.
Those becoming Jehovah’s Witnesses now take this vow which I cannot agree with:
On the basis of the sacrifice of Jesus Christ, have you repented of your
sins and dedicated yourself to Jehovah to do his will?
Do you understand that your dedication and baptism
identify you as one of Jehovah’s Witnesses in association with God’s
spirit-directed organization?
What happened to baptism in the name of the Father,
the Son, and the Holy Spirit? My loyalty is to God, not a manmade organization.
Who will I go away to? I don’t need to go away to
anyone. My previous vow is valid. Regarding Jesus–there is not another name
under heaven which we might get saved. And his yoke is kindly, the load light.
If men make it unbearable, are they following him?
I hereby disassociate myself from any connection with
the WTB&TS. May our Father, with his Spirit, direct and protect those of
honest hearts within the congregation of Jehovah’s Witnesses. For those who
have carefully considered this letter, I thank you.
Sincerely,
CJ Maurer